


Sincerely Me

by vancreep



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - College/University, Established Relationship, Letters, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Past Drug Use, eruri - Freeform, soldier erwin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-31
Updated: 2014-08-10
Packaged: 2018-02-11 04:48:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 1,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2054238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vancreep/pseuds/vancreep
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Will you write to me while I'm away?" "Why the hell would I do that?" "Humor me."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sincerely Yours

**Author's Note:**

> this was very loosely based on an rp i'm participating in - erwin away at war fighting titans while levi remained home. this takes place during erwin's first deployment. he had this brilliant idea to start sending letters out to levi while he's away. this collection might not go anywhere, seeing as it's four in the morning and i'm letting my mind do its thing. but it's kind of exciting to write at the same time...

Levi,

When I had asked you to write to me, I was hoping to get your letter before sending out my first. Then I remembered that you would never do that – the two weeks of waiting only confirmed my confidence in your inability to make the first move. I'm glad to have written my letter a week ago. It vaguely reminds me of another time you held back on making a first move. Ah, that's right – you were a sophomore in college, I was a senior. I asked you out first. Nothing changed after that. You haven't changed. Thank you for being you.

Sincerely yours, Erwin

 


	2. Sometimes Yours

Erwin,

It was my idea to stick with Skype and this great invention called the telephone. Since we're reminiscing, after the day you convinced me to agree to this nonsense, I have been thinking back to that one day I caught the flu. You wouldn't leave me alone, so I said 'fuck it' and we sat on the couch together. When I say sit, I mean you with your elbow on the arm rest, my head on your lap. You brushed your fingers through my hair- ( _Levi dragged his pen across the paper, scratching out the mess of words his hand simply could not stop writing._ ) You changed the channel to Lifetime and we watched some movie about a wife writing to her husband away at war. He died at the end, so I'm not really sure where you're going with this.

 

Sometimes yours, Levi


	3. Always

Levi,

I can't believe you remembered that. Now that you mention it, I do remember some of it. You wanted to watch one of your hospital dramas, but you were so drugged up with Nyquil that I took control of the remote. While you started to nod off – your right hand twitches when you're about to fall asleep – I brushed my fingers through your hair- ( _Erwin dragged his pen across the paper, scratching out the mess of words his hand simply could not stop writing._ ) I thought it would be humorous, but you didn't put up a fight. Nyquil took away that spark in you. I'm safe.

 

Always, Erwin


	4. Blondie

Blondie,

You were the one that gave me the Nyquil. “This way you won't keep me up all night with your whining,” said Erwin Smith. Or maybe that was just what I heard, you probably worded it in the most polite way possible. It's kind of like being insulted by Shakespeare. No idea what you're saying, but it sounded nice. Talk dirty to me in old English some time. Come woo me, woo me, for I am in a holiday humour.

 

Levi

 


	5. With Love

Levi,

It warms my heart that everything I say sounds like poetry to you. Though sometimes, when you talk, it feels like I'm listening to a radio station with no genre. Sometimes you're a soft ballad, other times you're a hit single with foul language and a catchy chorus. It's always exciting to talk to you, to hear you. I seem to know you well enough to assume that you looked up pick-up lines from Shakespeare on Google. I appreciate it, like I appreciate everything else you do. Though that was a weak attempt. O, wilt thou leave me so unsatisfied?

 

With love, Romeo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> levi's quote was from "as you like it." erwin's quote is from "romeo and juliet."


	6. Date Night

“You okay?”

“Huh?”

“You don't look well. Miss me too much?”

“...Shut up. I just have a headache.”

“Levi...”

“I'm not using again, don't go there. I already saw my doctor, he gave me some stuff.”

“What kind of stuff?”

“Just some meds. And again, I'm not using. I haven't since we started dating.”

“...I trust you. I just haven't seen you look this bad in a while.”

“We can't all be as charming as you.”  
  


_Levi adjusts himself in the chair, making an obscene sound as something was crushed under the wheels._   
  


“What was that?”

“Nothing. Don't worry about it.”

“You're being shady, I don't like it.”

“It's just a soda can.”

_Erwin squints into the camera._

“Is... is that an energy drink?”

“Yeah?”

“You would never let me drink them, I'm curious as to what changed.”

“Nothing. Just been sort of tired lately.”

“So, the headaches are from you not sleeping.”

“No, that's not-”

“And the reason behind you looking like you just got off one hell of a roller coaster is because you haven't slept in god knows how long.”

“I'm fine, I just-”

“You never mentioned any of that in your letters.”

“There's a lot I haven't mentioned in those fucking letters!”

“...Calm down.”

“It's like I'm writing a eulogy.”

“Then don't.”  
  


_There are minutes of silence. Levi has turned his attention to a flash game he had running in the background. Erwin's thumb and index finger are rubbing his temples._

  
“Do you have anything planned for next weekend?”

“I never have anything planned. I'm either here or at work.”

“So... date night?”

“You're there and I'm here.” 

“We're on video. We can just have one of those online dates.”  
  


_Levi clicks his mouse and leans back in his chair._

   
“Fine.”

 


	7. With All My Heart

Levi,

You looked perfect Saturday. Healthy. Like you finally got a good night's sleep. Being here is hard. When I'm with you I can normally see what's bothering you. When I'm away from you, I can only hope that you'll be open with me. Please don't shut me out. You know how it destroys you. It destroys me too, not knowing what goes on in your head. I come back in December in time for your graduation. I miss you every day.

 

PS – were those my old literature books I saw on the shelf behind you? I could have sworn I put those in storage last year.

 

With all my heart, Erwin

 


	8. Your Star

Erwin,

You're melodramatic. I was just dealing with some insomnia. I'm alone and normally reading your letters over would calm me down and help me sleep – ( _Levi taps his pen on the table and takes a deep breath before scratching out what he had written._ ) Yeah, those were your old books. You said you wanted to sell them but never got around to it. I took them out of storage because I felt like reading them. You know, an awful lot of these poets compare their lovers to the stars or the ocean. I can't say that about you. Stars die. Oceans are vast and empty. You're more like an inflatable pool that leaves a circle of dry, dead grass every summer. Leaving an imprint.

 

Your star, Levi


	9. Forgive Me

Levi,

I am soaring with your words. I can't say I've ever been described as a pool before. Maybe it's my eyes. You always did comment on how blue they were and that sometimes you swear you can see them in the dark. Poetry. You should switch majors, but I don't think you want to be like me. I'm sorry, but this has to be my last letter for a few weeks. Things are getting hectic here. I'll send you my next letter as soon as I can. In the meantime, find some funny videos for us to watch the next time I can Skype you. I love you.

 

Forgive me, Erwin

 

 


	10. Three Minutes

“Hey, I'm sorry, the call has to be short.”

 

“Of course it does.”

 

“I'm sorry, Levi, what else do you want me to say?”

 

“I don't know.”

 

“Please try forming a full sentence for me. I'm begging you. More than five words.”

 

“I don't know if I can do this.”

 

_Obviously the words he didn't want to hear, Erwin leans against the wall, the cord of the phone following him._

 

“Okay.”

 

“...Okay.”

 

_Levi hears someone yell on the other end. “Three minutes, Smith!”_

 

“So you're breaking up with me?”

 

“I don't fucking know. I'm just tired of being here alone, _thinking_ , always thinking...”

 

“Are you going to relapse?”

 

 _Levi clicks his tongue_. “Do you trust me?”

 

“With my life.”

 

_The words hurt, but Levi remains composed. Erwin's hands begin to sweat and his heart is either about to break or continue pounding in his tightening chest._

 

“I'm not going to relapse. I just feel like pieces of paper and ink isn't going to be enough to keep us going.”

 

“Then we won't use paper or ink.”

 

“Fine. Okay.”

 

“How about cardboard and crayons?”

 

 _In spite of himself, Levi has to chuckle. This is very Erwin and Levi is glad that nothing has changed._ “...I'm not leaving you.”

 

“I'm not leaving you either.”

 

_“Smith!”_

 

“You have to go. They're so damn loud.”

 

“I know, it's always loud here. Keep the bed warm for me. I love you.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

_The line goes dead before Erwin can get another word out, and he's pulled away from the phone._

 


End file.
